
Little Bobby Johnston, a horribly disfigured hunchback and Kindergarten student of Boston, Massachusetts, exhibited an episode of premature elation this Tuesday on the playground at Ben Franklin Elementary School. Johnston undoubtedly felt entitled to a bit of youthful boasting after his crushing defeat of all worthy contenders in the fifth consecutive somersault competition which involved over 12 competitors and spanned two separate recess breaks.
Bobby's undeniable dominance was cut short, however, when a majority of the group expressed desires to alter the rules and regulations of the event. Specifics are not available at this time, but the new competition code has effectively eliminated Bobby's chances at any future participation.
Rumors of exclusions based on last names starting with J have surfaced (and have been given due weight since J is the Kindergarten class' letter of the week), while many insiders openly admit that Bobby's severe spinal disorder may be the real determining factor; not only in his amazing ability to roll vertically like a truck tire, but also in the subsequent rule changes.
For now, Bobby seems quite content to fly his lunch pail around the tetherball courts and stick small bits of playground gravel in his nasal cavities. His future as a somersault aficionado remains at best, uncertain.
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